Sunday 14 September 2014

40 most funny code comments ever

These are borrowed from
http://stackoverflow.com/questions/184618/what-is-the-best-comment-in-source-code-you-have-ever-encountered and http://www.quora.com/Computer-Programming/What-are-some-of-the-funniest-comments-in-source-code



Exception up = new Exception("Something is really wrong.");
throw up;  //ha ha



//When I wrote this, only God and I understood what I was doing
//Now, God only knows 
 
 







stop(); // Hammertime!
 
 
 


// sometimes I believe compiler ignores all my comments
 
 
 
// I dedicate all this code, all my work, to my wife, Darlene, who will 
// have to support me and our three children and the dog once it gets 
// released into the public.
 
 
 



// somedev1 -  6/7/02 Adding temporary tracking of Login screen
// somedev2 -  5/22/07 Temporary my ass



 
 
 
// drunk, fix later
 
 
 


// Magic. Do not touch.
 
 
 




#define TRUE FALSE
 
 
 
//Happy debugging suckers
 
 
// I'm sorry.
 
 
return 1; # returns 1
 
 
Catch (Exception e) {
 //who cares?
} 



  

 
/*
 * You may think you know what the following code does.
 * But you dont. Trust me.
 * Fiddle with it, and youll spend many a sleepless
 * night cursing the moment you thought youd be clever
 * enough to "optimize" the code below.
 * Now close this file and go play with something else.
 */ 
 
 



try {

} finally { // should never happen 
} 
 
 

const int TEN=10; // As if the value of 10 will fluctuate... 
 
 
 


//This code sucks, you know it and I know it.  
 
 
//Move on and call me an idiot later.
 
 
 
double penetration; // ouch, no cumments needed
 
 


/////////////////////////////////////// this is a well commented line
 
 
 
// I don't know why I need this, but it stops the people being upside-down 
x = -x;
  
 




// I am not sure if we need this, but too scared to delete. 
 
 
 
doRun.run();  // ... "a doo run run".
  

 



# To understand recursion, see the bottom of this file 
At the bottom of the file:
# To understand recursion, see the top of this file
 
 
 




// I am not responsible of this code.
 
 
// They made me write it, against my will.
 
 
/* I did this the other way */
 
 



/* Please work */
 
 
 
// no comments for you
 
 
 
// it was hard to write
// so it should be hard to read



options.BatchSize = 300; //Madness? THIS IS SPARTA!


// I have to find a better job
 
 
 
# code below replaces code above - any problems?
# yeah, it doesn't fucking work.



class Act //That's me!!!
{
  ...
}
 
 
 
public boolean isDirty() {
    //Why do you always go out and
    return dirty;
}



Repeat
    ...
Until (JesusChristsReturn) ' Not sure



// Catching exceptions is for communists



// If this code works, it was written by Paul DiLascia. If not, I don't know
// who wrote it



//this formula is right, work out the math yourself if you don't believe me



// Comment this later
  




/** Logger */
private Logger logger = Logger.getLogger();



// Remove this if you wanna be fired



# This is becoz you messed with me the other day
if current_admin.name == "#{my_x_employer}"
  sleep(1000 * 3600)
end



# Linux Sex
$ date ; unzip ; strip ; touch ; grep ; finger ; mount ; fsck ; more ; yes ; umount ; sleep



// Peter wrote this, nobody knows what it does, don't change it!


}catch(Exception ex){
   // Houston, we have a problem
}


// If I from the future read this I’ll back in time and kill myself.


// TODO: I believe the method (and all class in general)
// doesn’t make any sense at all, but I’m sleepy and
// it works fine




// A function that retrieves all females from the database
// for processing and display:
function getGirls() { //if only it were really that simple


float boat;   // must be a float, otherwise it sinks.



// I can’t divide with zero, so I have to divide with something very similar 
result = number / 0.00000000000001.




// no comments for you
// it was hard to write
// so it should be hard to read